Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Sex Toys, That Company, & Blogs

I suddenly realized these are all sitting on a towel on my dresser out in the open. They weren't all used at once or on the same day, I'm just too lazy to put them away after letting them dry from cleaning. This isn't my whole collection, but yes - I do have an obvious affinity for pink. :)

I really enjoy sex toys. As my current income is ridiculously low, the only toys I have gotten in the last couple of months have been free ones from a company (see banner on right) for free.

I shop at that company for sex toys because it is the only online company I have found that specifically provides information about material safety with the product descriptions. Before finding that company I had no idea that some sex toys could be (and one actually has been) hazardous to my health. Even before I was getting free toys from said company I was recommending it to my friends and shopping there.

You will notice there are no sex toy reviews hosted here on my blog. To be perfectly honest, I don't know enough about HTML to host my reviews here rather than on that company's site. There are other companies I could offer myself to for review purposes, and I have done so, but this blog is relatively new and I have been rejected for that reason. I will likely someday post reviews here, but for now, I'm not.

There have been some problems between reviewers and that company. I have seen that company respond in ways I do not like to reviewer complaints. I have seen reviewers leave and I feel they are completely justified in doing so. Currently I have voiced concerns on the company's forums about some of the "guides" they have published on-site. I hate them and I want them changed, but I don't know exactly who to contact about that. I fully intend to keep making noise about it until something is done. I read today that there is a plan to do something about it in progress, so I'm giving them time to do that before I really start ranting.

Some people say that company is not "sex-positive" and that because of that and the problems some reviewers have had, it is not a company worthy of reviewer participation. Again, from what I have seen I don't blame those reviewers for being angry; however, at this point in my limited experience I feel the benefits of material safety information outweigh the negative experiences I have had with that company.

Last week a very influential "sex blogger" said that people shouldn't have so many toys reviews on their blogs. A couple of other influential "sex bloggers" jumped on board. All of them generally said that they hate seeing so many toy reviews, that the companies people are writing for are not "sex-positive", and that people shouldn't call themselves a "sex blogger" if the majority of their blog posts are sex toy reviews. Sex toy reviewers responded, understandably, with hurt and frustration.

Guess what? You are reading MY blog. You chose to keep reading to this point and you are more than welcome to stop reading it and move on. I write about sex related topics here, including experiences in gender, sexuality, and toys. Look at my blog roll. Those are people I respect enough to list their blogs on mine. If you actually go look at their blogs you will see an almost even mix of sex toy reviews and other sexual topics such as gender and experience.

Point: If you want to call yourself a sex blogger, a monkey blogger, or anything else, I really don't care. If you want to write about sex toys, yipee! If you want to write about your thoughts on sexism, yipee! If you don't like that company and because I advertise for them you don't want to read my posts, yipee! I'm going to read what I want and you are going to write about what you want. Am I a "sex blogger"? Probably. Are people who primarily review sex toys on their blogs "sex bloggers"? My opinion: Well, duh - they are reviewing SEX toys.

*Disclaimer: There are some sex toy reviewer blogs that are really awful. If you read a blog and the posts never mention material safety concerns, sharing issues (whether or not the toy can be safely shared), or most of the posts seem more like advertisements for a company than reviews of products - you should probably take a look at my blog roll for better reviews.*

Please stop criticizing. There are lots of blogs out there about lots of different topics and I don't see why you even care about the topics of others' blog posts. Don't read them if you don't like them.

Now, as for me

I need to go do something with those toys...



Good post. If you've read my blog, you know I agree. You know what I say? Fuck influential and popular bloggers. Just because you're either or both of those things doesn't mean you're right or better than anybody else. They really need to get the fuck over themselves. Seriously. Sorry for the rant-iness of my comment. I've been in a very rant-y mood of late. lol


Very well said. As you know, I agree. :)


Ditto on what Eliot and Epiphora said. And of course, what you wrote! I'm waiting for those guides too :)

Miss KissThis


And I plan on reading whatever you choose to write :)


If it's any consolation- They're replacing the guides. They commissioned a few reviewers (Betty Rocket is the only one I know of) to write the new guides.

Great post! :)


P.S. I was contacted the day after this post with an email address to voice my concerns over the mentioned "guidelines". I sent a very specific email to person and got a WONDERFUL response. It reaffirmed to me that I will continue to work with "that company"

Thanks for your comments. :)


Actually, you have a point there that some of other blogs are just only promoting their websites. But there are other blogs that really make sense and it really gives good information, even if they just promote their website.


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